Flirting 101

I need help flirting…okay so I don’t need help flirting. I’m happily married and well hmmm did I say…yeah okay, happily married and DH would probably frown upon me heading out to the bars and flirting with every hot young stud out there. Silly man won’t let me have any fun, but I digress.

As we’ve discuss, flirting seems to be a dying art form. Why?? It’s so much fun. The casual looks across the room, then quickly looking away or giggling with a girl friend. Then, the sustained eye contact. The type where you try to telepathically tell the object of your affection how attracted to him/her you are. Eyes can say so many things without ever a word having been spoken.

But what happens when he actually comes over to you and buys you a drink. Okay, thank you is a good start, but where do you go from there? Do you rely on the man to lead the conversation? If it were me, hell yeah. I have absolutely no idea what to say to the opposite sex, especially when I’m attracted to him. I stutter, talk about the weather, talk about my kids (yeah, how sexy am I).

And is it really fair to leave it all up to the other person, be it male or female. You should be able to hold your own in a conversation. What would you and a girlfriend talk about? Well okay you don’t need to tell him what a nice package he has after saying thank you for the drink. All flirting would be out the door along with you and Mr. Hefty. Out to the pick up for a quick BJ and a thank you ma’am. Where the hell does that leave you?

I think you need to know more about the world than what is in your tiny little circle so you have things to talk about. Music, art, books, movies…even if you don’t go see all the movies or read the latest books, how long does it take to read the reviews.

I think more expectations are put on a person flirting in public, than flirting like we do here on the posts. Obviously here we all know the score; we’re just looking for some fun conversation and a release of tension. So why can’t we do that in person without the other half expecting to get laid within the hour. And hey, nothing wrong with that type of release either, but that’s not flirting. That’s a whole nuther discussion. Maybe one for LEX, Sex without the quilt.

What was I saying…oh yeah, so read up on current events, practice conversations with the mirror, do what you gotta do so the next time this ridiculously hot human being walks ups to you and says “What’s a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?” You can come right back with “Did you know the Dow fell 3 points today?” Wait no that’s wrong… how about “Have you seen the latest slasher flick, all that blood and guts really gets my motor revving.” Hmmm, that’s not quite right either. Maybe “Oh, I’ve never seen eye’s the same color as swamp mud.” No? Well how about…..

PS: Oh Mr. Brady…cum out cum out wherever you are.