Being a romance author entails so much more than just writing a book. It’s an entire lifestyle. So before you put fingers to keyboard, here are some essential things you will need in order to be a proper romance author.

Have a Harem of Gorgeous Men

(This should be you)

This is absolutely the most important one. We all know that the only reason anyone buys romance is for the sex. In order to create the most believable, passionate and erotic chick porn out there, you need to do your research. Therefore, you need a harem.

Travel to Exotic Locations

(Here looks good)

Romance simply cannot flourish in a banal setting. The backdrop to your epic tale must be as intriguing and dazzling and jet-setting as your characters and their whirlwind love affair.

Have a Tragic Love Affair

(There cannot be happiness without sorrow)

You can’t know (and hence write about) the beauty and power of true love without having thought you were in love in the past only to either lose that love or realize it wasn’t love at all. This could be because you were blinded by lust and infatuation or maybe you picked the wrong man who wasn’t worthy of you or you might have even had a nice man that wasn’t very good in bed. Whatever the reason, a tragic – and preferably tormented – romantic past is a must.

Know How to Kick Some Ass

(He could TOTALLY teach me a thing or three)

It doesn’t matter if you are writing historical, paranormal, erotic or scifi, your hero needs to be a total ass-kicking stud even if he doesn’t actually kick any ass at all. Find yourself a weapons expert, a personal trainer and/or a hand-hand combat specialist and convince them to tell you all their secrets. And then add them to the harem.

And remember to always, always have fun!

Blog — Twitter — Facebook — Sculpting a Demon at Ellora’s Cave

Welcome….I’m Lyncee and this is my first time blogging at Flirty Bitch Authors. In the months to come I have some topics I’m excited to blog about but I thought start with my view on writing…and with the heart of what I write – romance. Be it a suspense or paranormal romance is at the center of my writing. So let me ask what is……romantic?

Flowers?

Candy?

Candlelight?

A bubble bath?

Some would say all of the above while others would have their own ideas. In writing romance, there are many definitions that a writer must deal with. So – what is….romantic?

Often, the same scene can have a double meaning. For example….
The shrill buzz of the doorbell shattered the silence. Darla glanced at her watch as she sat her book down. Twenty after nine. Who could it be? She stood and walked to the front room. The low rumble of distant thunder echoed in the night air as she opened the door. Michael stood in the pale yellow porch light.
“I thought you were still stuck in Colorado.” Darla’s pulse raced as she tripped over the words. “They said all flights were still ground.”
He held out his hand, offering a rectangular box with a green silk bow decorating the top. “It’s your birthday. I couldn’t miss it. So I rented a car and drove. Here, your favorite chocolates.”
“Oh, Michael,” she stepped outside and into his embrace.
OR – same scene and props but totally different outcome -
The shrill buzz of the doorbell shattered the silence. Darla glanced at her watch as she sat her book down. Twenty after nine. Who could it be? She stood and walked to the front room. The low rumble of distant thunder echoed in the night air as she opened the door. Michael stood in the pale yellow porch light.
Darla’s heart skipped a beat, panic surging through her. “What are you doing here?”
He held out his hand, offering a rectangular box with a green silk bow decorating the top. “It’s your birthday. I couldn’t miss it. Here, your favorite chocolates.”
“No, Michael,” she stepped inside and tried to shut the door, but his fingers stopped it.
While these examples are very basic, they show how the same thing – a box of candy – can mean two entirely different things. One scary the other a sweet gesture.

As a romance writer, I realize it’s more than a simple prop that makes romance. It’s the characters, their relationship and the setting and I have to use all three if I’m going to create a romance that will pull the reader in. I’ve read great romantic scenes set in places I’d never have thought of as a romantic place yet through skilled writing they were.
So tell me, what are some of the more ‘off-beat’ romantic settings you’ve read? Glad you stopped by.

The Wild One

The Wild One by Gail Roarke

Available now from Cobblestone Press.

They always say to write what you know. Well, I’ve been to events like this. So….

Blurb: When Angela and her two closest friends drop in on a hotel sex party, it’s an eye-opening experience. It’s also more than her friends can handle. They don’t stay long.

But Angela isn’t content to continue barhopping with her friends, telling tales about how naughty they were to briefly witness such debauchery. She returns alone to experience the debauchery for herself and discover if it’s as much fun as it seemed.

Excerpt:

Angela crowded close behind Lourdes as she stopped abruptly in front of the hotel room door. Michelle bumped into Angela and giggled nervously. Angela couldn’t blame her. She could feel nervous giggles poised to escape her own lips.

“This is it,” Lourdes said. The glance she gave Angela and Michelle suggested that she wasn’t quite as calm as she’d like them to believe. Nonetheless, Lourdes knocked firmly on the door. Angela could hear the faint sound of conversation through the door. It didn’t sound like a sex party.

The door opened a crack, and a short, redheaded woman peeked out from behind it. She looked them over, and they must have passed inspection because she backed up, opening the door and silently inviting them inside.

Angela followed Lourdes and Michelle into the room. She glanced back as the redhead closed the door behind them. The woman was short, busty and naked. Silver piercings gleamed in her nipples. She noticed Angela’s look. “Hi, I’m Emily.”

“Angela.” She wasn’t sure what to say next. What do you say to a naked woman you’ve just met? A familiar squeal of greeting saved her from having to find out. She turned to see Vicki leap up from a sofa to greet her three newly arrived friends.

“You made it!” Vicki sounded surprised as well as pleased. She’d tried to get them to come to the party with her, but they had turned her down. It was only after spending some time club hopping that Lourdes had suggested taking Vicki up on her offer. Just, you know, to see what a sex party looked like.

Angela had secretly wanted to go all along, but she hadn’t had the nerve to do it. When Lourdes suggested it again, emboldened by alcohol, Angela had agreed that it sounded like fun. Together, they’d convinced Michelle to give it a try.

Vicki had hugged Lourdes, and now she threw herself at Angela. She was wearing a pair of lace panties and nothing else. “Hey, girl,” Vicki said. “I didn’t think you’d show.”

“We almost didn’t.” Angela gave Vicki a quick hug. “But Lourdes insisted.”

“Me? You wanted to too!”

Vicki laughed and turned to greet Michelle with a hug. “Well, you’re here. That’s what counts. Let me introduce you around.”

Angela looked around, taking in the room as Vicki made introductions. It was a fairly standard hotel room. A bathroom just inside the door to the hall, a king-size bed, and a dresser opposite the bed. The dresser was covered with food and drink—a variety of snack foods, dips, a bucket of chicken, several large bottles of soda, a couple of wine bottles, and disposable plates and utensils.

The back of the room, normally occupied by a small writing desk and chair, was crowded with half a dozen chairs obtained from elsewhere. The chairs formed a rough circle, and about half of them were occupied. Three women and one man occupied the conversation circle. None of them wore more than a towel.

The connecting doors to the rooms on either side of this one were propped open. The sounds of sex drifted through a doorway. Angela couldn’t see into there from her position, but she could see into the other room. It contained two large beds, both unoccupied.

“You’ve met Emily,” Vicki said. Emily waved. Vicki named names, but Angela wasn’t listening. It sounded like at least two women were getting fucked next door, and she was intensely curious—and embarrassed to reveal that fact by walking over to the doorway to look.

Vicki took care of that. “And in this room,” she said, pausing in the doorway, “we have the rest of the gang.”

Lourdes, Angela and Michelle all eyed one another for a moment then collectively walked over to join Vicki, who stepped into the next room. They followed. Angela felt her pulse race in anticipation. She’d had sex and even seen some porn. But she’d never seen real people doing it.

Because, as the Kentucky Derby showed on Saturday, sometimes the little guys can score one against big guys with deeper pockets. And the cool thing is, when that happens, it’s probably an even bigger win, because it revitalizes interest in the sport (or in the publishing industry).

For those who don’t follow horse racing (and shame on you), a $9500 gelding (from Canada) named Mine that Bird came from way behind to stun the field. I suspect, in reality, that there were probably traffic jams, which created the perfect opportunity. But that’s okay. Because things like that happen in both industries. And it’s a good thing when it does.

Why? Because it inspires hope. Read the rest of this entry »